technology Jokes

I called customer service because my smart thermostat kept changing the temperature by itself. The agent asked if I had tried turning it off and on again. I said yes, and now it…

I bought a smart speaker to make my home feel more organized. It now reminds me about every task I have not done, in a voice that sounds exactly like my mother. I miss when appl…

I called tech support because my smart speaker kept answering questions I had not asked. The agent said it was a new anticipation feature. Great, I said—can it anticipate when I…

My new smart fridge sends me a notification every time I open the door: Are you sure you need a snack? I disabled it after the fridge started sending a second alert whenever I s…

My smart fridge started sending notifications every time I opened the door. I turned them off, and now it just silently judges me like the rest of my family.

My neighbor installed a smart doorbell that recognizes faces, packages, and unusual activity. Last night it sent him an alert about me standing on his porch with a casserole. Th…

My family shares one streaming account, so we created a password nobody could forget. It was my mother’s birthday, followed by my father’s birthday, followed by the date the dog…

My smart fridge started ordering groceries by itself, so I checked its settings. It had learned our family’s habits and scheduled a weekly delivery of vegetables nobody eats. Ap…

My smart fridge started tracking everything I ate and sent me a notification saying my snack choices were concerning. I unplugged it, but five minutes later my phone buzzed with…

My neighbor installed a smart doorbell that announces every visitor. Yesterday it said, Please state your business, and the delivery driver froze on the porch for ten seconds. H…

I called customer service because my smart fridge kept ordering groceries I never asked for. The agent told me to unplug it for ten minutes. I did, and now it is ordering extens…

My smart fridge started ordering groceries without asking me. I contacted support, and they said I should reset it to factory settings. I would, but the fridge has already chang…

My new refrigerator is connected to the internet, so it sends me reminders when I am running low on groceries. Last night, it sent an alert saying I was running low on self-cont…

My phone asked me to prove I was not a robot by selecting every picture containing a traffic light. I passed on the third try, but it still locked me out because apparently huma…

My phone suggested I turn on screen-time limits, so I agreed. Now it sends me reminders while I’m watching videos. At this point, my phone isn’t a device—it’s a tiny parent who …

My smart fridge started sending me reminders to eat healthier. I asked how it knew what I was eating, and it said it had been tracking my snacks. Then it recommended I install a…

I bought a voice-controlled trash can to make chores easier. It opens whenever I say, This is ridiculous, so now it has better emotional timing than most people I know.

My aunt bought a smart speaker to make her mornings easier. She asked it for a cheerful reminder, and it announced that she had a dentist appointment at nine and a personality a…

My grocery delivery app asked me to rate the driver from one to five stars. I gave him five, but the app said, Please be more specific. So I typed, He arrived before I had time …

My phone warned me that six hours of screen time was unhealthy and suggested I go outside. I told it to mind its own business, so it opened the weather app to prove it had been …

I emailed a company to complain that its online form had too many required fields. The reply asked me to describe the issue in 500 characters, attach a screenshot, and confirm I…

My smart fridge sent me a notification saying I was out of snacks. I opened the door to check, and it immediately updated the notification: You are also out of self-control.

My new smart doorbell sends alerts whenever someone approaches, so I installed it to feel safer. Yesterday it notified me that I was standing outside my own house looking suspic…